It’s dangerous to go alone!
That said the old man in The Legend of Zelda before giving Link his sword to go fight Ganondorf and save Princess Zelda.
Maybe you don’t understand why I wrote that reference at the beginning but it’s going to be clear if you keep reading this story.
When I started college, I was afraid.
College was a new world. I wanted to be a good student this time (I wasn’t that good in school).
Some people had previous knowledge about the career. And I felt intimidated.
When you feel less than other people there are two things you can do: do something about it or lay down on the floor and start to cry.
I told myself I needed to study this time and seek knowledge everywhere.
This was my profession. The thing I will be doing for the rest of my life. I love it, it would be bad if I sucked at it.
Now, why is that title?
Thing is, that initiative and passion I had weren’t in everybody around me.
Not trying to praise me or say I deserve some merits for being me, but I wanted to do something with my life before it ends. I wouldn’t be here without a purpose, right?
I’m sure you can relate if I tell you that there are students that see their careers only as assignments and boring things to do.
Not all people take the risk of living a meaningful life and actually set themselves a real purpose.
Sure, you can’t generalize that. I’ve met great people who want to actually do something with their lives. But I’m not surrounded by that kind of people, usually.
The thing about going alone
It’s safe to say we as human beings are social animals.
What does that mean? We love company. And why wouldn’t we? It is awesome. That feeling of not mattering to anyone goes away and fear from everything vanishes from existence.
Being human is being sociable. Being alone is a bad feeling most of the time. Having nobody to share your ideas sucks. Going out alone sucks too.
In the career example, we always get in a group with our friends. Almost no one chooses a group where there are new people. And our performance in that group is not the same if we don’t have friends with us. We tend to be negative about being alone. That’s not the ideal thought about our situation.
I’m writing this story because the will to go alone changed my life.
How? Glad you asked.
The reason for this
Two years ago I had the opportunity to take two experiences that helped me grow as a professional and person. This experiences came from my interest in doing things outside college to be better. And sure I needed to have them with friends because it’s always good to share experiences with your friends.
In the first experience, I was with two friends taking a course. They started it with me and achieved half of it. Then, they got bored and uninterested in finishing it and left.
And the question appeared: should I stay or should I go?
Stay. Said my mind immediately.
I finished it. Alone. I had to.
In the other experience, I asked like five of my mates to go to a development meetup. All got motivated to go at first. The day of the event, no one went. But I did.
Why? Because I knew both experiences could make me improve in some aspect of my life, and if you have to take something from all of this, take this phrase:
Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship in your life.
Got that from Neil Pasricha’s book, The Happiness Equation. You’re welcome.
Going alone is dangerous. Sometimes you don’t even know yourself and that’s completely normal. You have to do the things for yourself first, then eventually you will have the opportunity to do things for others. This is not about being selfish, it is about taking good calls.
To stop doing something that is good for you because you’re the only one doing it it’s worse.
There are decisions in life that only affect you. Things that only impact you and if you choose wrong, they will only be against you.
Now, I got to tell you…
Take this!
This is the sword I’m giving to you, experience and knowledge.
Take this advice for your life. Learn how to identify the moments you need to go alone and the moments when you might need some help to solve the problem or company to enjoy the ride.
Don’t let anyone stop you from doing what you want. Only if it’s your boss or client telling you how they want their product to be.
And don’t forget to be happy and positive first, negativity never did something good to someone.
This post may change as time passes, it’s always good to revisit and add some things I missed to it.
